when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Who wears a wallet chain?!
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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