Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I love having hate sex.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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