I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
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