Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
