I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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