this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
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She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
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Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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