windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
you're hired as official boob wrangler
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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