its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
