We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Randomize