she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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