You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
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