Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Randomize
