My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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