this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
