We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize