it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
