I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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