Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize