It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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