One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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