How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
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