Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I think your dad took our porno
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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