Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
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