Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
