Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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