is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
