That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
