dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
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