whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize
