At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
