somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
