I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
