I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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