dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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