windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Im part way to drunk.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
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