Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
