Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
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