SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
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