the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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