big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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