just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
