My hair reeks of homosexuality.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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