Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize