I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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