But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Randomize
