Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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