Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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