I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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