dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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