Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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